Friday, April 28, 2006

A Lose-Lose game

Hi Love, How are you?
Your mobile was switched off since the afternoon
(Me flopping in the chair wearily)
Sorry the battery was down.
But you have a car charger
(Wondering why I didn’t grab a
bottle of cold water before I came in.
The bottle here has ordinary water)
I was driving the van today.
Then put a charger in the van too
Ok, sorry. I will tomorrow.
(I stare at the pale blue walls of the hospital.
I’d been driving around in
the hot and dusty roads the whole day
and am feeling so caked with grime,
that if someone took a section of me,
from the rings of the dirt
he’d know which part of this city
I was at what time of the day.
Just for a moment I wonder
if the pale blue wall were a
pool, how, I could have dived into it.)
You don’t know how difficult
it is for me waiting the whole day
for you to come in the evening

(Coming out of the empty pool
feeling more thirsty and dirty)
I’ll come early tomorrow.
It’s so damn depressing here
(Looking at the sudoku puzzle in the newspaper nearby)
You’ll be out in a couple of days
And the pain
(Ha, I know where #7 comes in the 9th box)
Yes I know and I’m sorry.
What do you know about pain and
don’t gimme this sorry -warry.

(Taking my eyes off the paper)
Look I can relate to it.
You can never relate to the pain of anyone
who has just had her insides scooped out.
After all, you are just a man.

I have no words.
Neither has she.

The overhead ancient fan
creaks apologetically, and
blows down more hot air into the
tinder dry room ready to
turn into an inferno if one single
word is uttered.
We wait silently,
till one of us is spent of
of our own rage and misery and
holds out a tentative flag of regrets.

Meanwhile, its getting darker outside.


Blogger floots said...

beautifully bleak reminder of how hard it can be to get close

(loved that dirt rings image too) :)

thanks for the visit
let me know if you post pix of the "holiday hills"

8:47 AM  
Blogger Inkblot said...

rather lovely post-sensitively done.

10:10 AM  
Blogger bittersweet said...

Liked how you bring the tension in,
one I can relate to as well.

funny how an overhead fan only manage to swirl the heat around, not cool us down.:)

9:20 AM  
Blogger Capegirl said...

gritty and real and heartbreakingly honest. there should be more such poems.

5:56 PM  
Blogger sigmund fraud said...

floots, inks, bitters, capes. Thanx for all the nice things you people had to say.


7:18 PM  
Blogger bilbo said...

blows down more hot air into the
tinder dry room ready to
turn into an inferno if one single
word is uttered

Again awesome imagery in these lines. I could actually visualise a small spark waiting to escape.

5:22 PM  
Blogger saltyfeline said...

really enjoyed this. thanks.
come on over..

8:20 PM  
Blogger Jemima said...

"I have no words.
Neither has she."

Sometimes I have arguments where plenty is said, but none of it is true. And while both parties know this, neither is prepared to be big enough to not take offence.

That's where this poem took me.

Thanks, I think.

12:54 AM  
Blogger sigmund fraud said...

Thanx a lot,

bilbs, for reading everything that I scribble, and yet have something nice to say.

Saltyfeline, I have read all your posts and liked very much the few poems of yours that I could comprehend.

JvS, for dropping by. I will visit your site soon.

8:37 AM  
Blogger Gilbert Koh said...

That was a GREAT poem. Enjoyed it very much - the way it mixes her words; your words; and what you're doing at the same time.

4:24 PM  
Blogger sigmund fraud said...

Wow, Gilbert, I'm wordless...Thanx a lot. It means so much to me, because you are one poet whose work I admire a lot.

7:00 AM  
Blogger mis_nomer said...

Ooh, I like this one. :) I like the italics and the brackets.. it gives multiple perspectives to a single moment..

7:44 PM  

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